Bawal Umihi Dito The PeePisode

Welcome to the Sherwin M Podcast, a podcast about the adventures of being Filipino-American. I am your host, Sherwin. Ooh, how’s that tagline? So, this is episode 7, Bawal Umihe Dito, the P-episode. I was debating on whether I should do this episode or when I should do it.

I was worried about the listeners thinking how this show may be. The topic is, I don’t know, like maybe to some people they may find it disgusting or gross, but I didn’t want to make that impression nor do I want to make this episode that way. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal.

So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal.

So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal.

So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal.

So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal.

So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. So I waited a few episodes and decided I’m just going to do it because I don’t want to make it a big deal. you know, that our job as parents is to pretty much teach our kids like what we learned in our lives and just pass it on to them so that they can be, I mean, in my opinion, they should be a better person than you are. So, but at the same time, let’s also take the opportunity to learn

from them. And so it’s like, I’ve always tried to prepare myself whenever my kids ask me things. But honestly, you really can’t always be prepared. What I mean by that is, so here’s an example. So this past week, my son, who’s the oldest, he had spring break. So I decided to take most of

the week off. And so I tried to have him take a nap. And this, the oldest doesn’t really like taking naps. He doesn’t really like taking naps. He doesn’t really like taking naps.

The youngest is already programmed to take naps. So when I try to have him take a nap, I usually have him like just lie with me in our bedroom. And I noticed he had his hands in his, like in his pants. And I’m like, what are you doing? And so he’s like, my hands are cold, and it’s warm down there. And so I’m like, what are you doing? And he’s like, my hands are cold, and it’s warm down

there. And so I’m like, what are you doing? And so he’s like, my hands are cold, and it’s warm down there. And so I’m like, what are you doing? And so he’s like, my hands are cold, and it’s warm down there. And so I’m like, what are you doing? And so he’s like, my hands are cold, and it’s warm down

there. And so I yeah, I don’t know. I just kept quiet because I don’t I don’t know how to, you know, respond to that. So I mean, what do you what do you say? I mean, I mean, as guys, you know, like, yeah, yeah, it gets warm there. I don’t know. So hopefully I don’t gross you out with these

stories. But but it’s I just wanted to share it because it’s just it’s those things like it just makes me like really happy. Being a dad, you know, like, the situations that they put put me in. I mean, so far have been, you know, something that I could laugh at and share. So hopefully in the future, they don’t, you know, but anyway, I just wanted to share that because yeah, I was speechless. I didn’t know how to respond to that. So those are all the updates.

No feedback this week. So I’m going to get into the main like main topic. So this is episode seven. Bawal umihe dito. The P episode. I haven’t really said much before unless you already know what this

means. But Bawal umihe dito means uh, Bawal means, um, B-A-W-A-L means, um, you’re not allowed. Umihe means P. Dito means here, like H-E-R-E, here, like location. So yeah, so the the translation to Bawal umihe dito is you are not allowed to pee here.

Why am I doing this episode? It’s like a, a common sign, I guess, sign in the Philippines, at least when, um, because I, I took a lot of trips back to the Philippines, uh, since coming to America. And so I, I just try to observe, right? So there are plenty of like walls and yeah, just walls, uh, throughout the city. And primarily you’ll see this, uh, just in the city, like in Manila, just big cities, right? And you’re,

you’re like, well, why do they have these signs up? I mean, isn’t it obvious you shouldn’t be peeing here? You know, I mean, for one, it’s public. It’s like kind of indecent. Um, and like, just not sanitary or whatever. And so, but yeah, it’s pretty much, um, at least in the nineties,

when I went back, um, very common. Uh, I think the last time I went back home was like, I think 2013, maybe, or 2012. I don’t see the signs as much. And I don’t know if, uh, if, if like, cause I think in some areas they started putting like stalls. They, it’s just, and this is for, for men, uh, mind you. So, uh, I don’t think many women have this issue, but it’s the men,

the men have this issue and the boys, right? And so yes, throughout the city, you would see these signs. Um, and, and it’s because there were problems of just men and kids that would just, they had to pee and they, they just did it like along the wall. So there was this old joke. Um, I believe it was in a movie and it was Dolphy. Uh, he’s a Filipino comedian. Um,

like one of my favorites, really awesome guy. Um, sadly he, he passed away, a few years ago. Um, and before he passed, I actually saw him and met him in, uh, Makati and we were in, um, global. I can’t remember the actual name, like market market in Makati. And it was close to Christmas. It might’ve been Christmas Eve, maybe the 23rd of December.

And we were just hanging out and there was this restaurant out there with outdoor dining. And, um, I just saw him. I just saw him with two other people. Um, just having dinner and I went to have, he’s like, Oh my God, is that, is that Dolphy? And she was like, yeah, I think so. I just kept inching closer and closer.

And it was sure enough, it was him. And I didn’t want to bother him, but I just had to meet him. You know, it’s one of those, just one of those things, like there’s a legend right there, you know, in, in comedy, Filipino comedy, a legend, you know, he’s right there. And, um, I just didn’t want to bother him. Uh, it was, it was close to Christmas. He’s probably having dinner with family, but I just, you know what?

Screw this, man. I, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. And so I just approached him and I’m like, uh, and I just said, Mr. Dolphy, cause I don’t remember his last name or anything. That’s what he goes by. He just has one name. Um, I’m like, Oh my goodness. You know, Merry Christmas.

Um, you know, so glad to meet you. You know, I’m sure when I’m a huge fan, shook his hand, didn’t even let go as I was talking to him. And I just wanted to show him how, how much I appreciated, um, all the entertainment throughout the years. And, um, it was just awesome. And I, I wanted to ask for a photo, but I think just shaking his hand was enough and just being able to tell him that how much I appreciated like all the, the years of entertainment and just thanking him. Um, and plus I, I didn’t want to disrupt his dinner and also bring

attention to him. Cause there was, there were a lot of people there. Um, and so I was, uh, I tried to be respectful of his time and, um, but yeah, that was so awesome. I think it was like a good minute just shaking his hand and just talking to him and really nice dude. But anyway, off to a tangent, but, um, so yeah, so, so Dolphy is, um, this actor comedian. And, um, I think there was

this movie where there was a scene and he, um, he was like in the middle of the movie and he was in America. I think he, he went to America. It was a movie about him coming to America. Um, and so he was used to like peeing in public on the wall. And so he, um, he was in America and he had to go, he had to go pee and there was no bathrooms or at least he didn’t know where bathrooms were.

So he just went, he just went and, um, he peed right on the wall. And so these, these officers, came and, um, were like, Hey sir, what are you doing? And he’s like, Oh, I gotta, I gotta go to the bathroom. I can’t hold it. So, you know, I’m doing it right here. And so, and I’m paraphrasing,

I don’t, I don’t remember the exact words, but, and so the, the police officers were like, well, you can’t do that. That’s against the law. And then Dolphy’s like, no, it’s not against the law. It’s against the wall. Sorry. It’s kind of corny, but man, it’s, it’s pretty funny.

It’s pretty. So, um, so yeah, I, I’ve always remembered, um, that, that scene in the movie. Um, so anyway, so like I mentioned before, I have three stories about this and yeah, um, the Bawal Umihe Dito thing is pretty common in the city and hopefully it’s, it’s improved. But my first story is, um, I, I went to San Beda, the school, when I was in Philippines. Um, this, this school is like, I think it’s a private school. I’m sorry.

I don’t really know much. Cause I was so young. I was so young. I think I was in first grade. I, so I went to San Beda for a year or two before I migrated or immigrated to, um, Chicago. And

every morning we do, um, like Bayang Magiliw. And so I had to look, I looked, I had to look up, uh, some information about this and learn some stuff. So I’ve always called it Bayang Magiliw, but it really isn’t, that’s not the name. It’s Lupang Hinirang. So Lupang Hinirang is translated as the chosen land. And Lupang Hinirang is the national anthem of the

Philippines. It was composed by Julian Felipe in 1898. And the lyrics were adopted from a Spanish poem called Filipinas written by Jose Palma. It was translated into Tagalog in the 1940s and a version was adopted in 1956, which is the version we hear now with some slight changes in the 1960s. And this is per Wikipedia. So anyway, um, in usually in schools in the Philippines,

they, they do the national anthem every morning before school starts. So, uh, as memory serves me, um, one time we were outside doing the national anthem. I was telling the teacher, like, I, I have to go cause man, I can’t hold it anymore. And so our uniforms were like khaki shorts and like a white shirt, like a white polo. And the teacher was just not having it like, no, we got to stand here during the national anthem. And, you know, we got to, you know,

be respectful and blah, blah, blah. So I’m like, but I gotta go. He’s like, you know what? And I don’t know if the teacher was messing around, but you know, if you gotta go, go there. And I’m like, really? So I did. I, I just, I just went in my pants. Like, and so the teacher saw it and I don’t

know. So my aunt, Tita Uncing, shout out Tita Uncing. And, um, she had to come from home, and, um, she brought me another pair of shorts. I, I just went, I don’t know. I don’t know how else to say it. I mean, I was in, I think I was in first grade and, you know, I, I pretty much

take things literally at that age. So, uh, she said I could go. So I did. So I went, but, um, but yeah, so that was the first story. And you’re probably like, wow, how come this guy has three stories about peeing? Um, hopefully I haven’t lost many audience yet. I’m trying not

to be disgusting. I’m just sharing stories. Okay. So apologies if I have, um, hopefully these are entertaining to you guys, but to me, it just makes me smile as I think about it. Okay. So

the next story, uh, my second story, uh, happened in the second grade. Okay. So in the second grade, I was now in Chicago and, um, I went to St. Jerome’s. So shout out to my classmates back then. I only remember one and I’m friends with them on Facebook. So shout out to Eugene. What’s up, man? And but yeah, St. Jerome’s in Chicago. And so this was in second grade. Brand new. I’m just brand new in America, right?

I was pretty much good with English. English was taught throughout the Philippines. So I was I was very comfortable talking in English. But but the version of English I learned, I guess you could say it’s proper English. I don’t know. But but anyway, so there was a time where I had I had to use the bathroom. Right.

So I asked the teacher, could I go to the restroom? You know, and I think I even mentioned, could I go to the comfort room? And spoiler spoiler alert, I may do an episode about comfort rooms or CR. Right. Anyway, I had to like pause and I’m like, I don’t think they know what that is.

So I just said, could I go to the bathroom? And so she’s like, OK. And I believe there was like a rule that we had to go in pairs. We had to go with partners or whatever. And so she asked if anyone else needed to go to the bathroom and another kid wanted to go, another boy.

And so we went, we got our hall pass and we went and so got into the bathroom and I was just like, OK, what are these things? What I was looking at were the urinals, right? The ones that are against the wall and women probably won’t understand this because they probably haven’t seen inside of a. Men’s restroom, but men and boys, you know what I’m talking about, right? So I think this was like the first time I’ve seen a urinal because I’m only used to seeing a toilet.

And so I chose not to use the the urinal because I didn’t know how how it worked or whatever. And so I went into one of the stalls and just did my thing. All of a sudden. I look at the corner of my eye, looked up and the kid that went to the bathroom with me started like climbing the wall and started peeking as I was like peeing. And I was like, dude, what?

As a second grader, I don’t know how to react like that, man. I don’t know how to react to that. So I ran back to class and told the teacher and when I told the teacher, I was like. Mom, mom, you know, because that’s how we address female like women, like older women who we respect, but we’re not really related to. Right.

Who we don’t really call Tita. It’s just mom. Right. Like mom or teacher. Teachers are usually that mom or a professor.

So for for women, we say mom. So mom, mom. So and so was peeking as I was jingling. OK, so so jingling. OK, so it is English.

It is English. But that’s like our in Tagalog. It’s like a slang slang English word, I guess jingling. And she looked at me and was like, what is what is jingling? I’m like, oh, man.

And like I was thinking, oh, not my English again. And so when I was I think I used urinating or something. So I was I was pretty advanced as as, you know, many other kids in the Philippines are because their education there, at least back then, where I felt was, you know, a lot more advanced than anywhere else. I actually tested out to to be in the fourth grade when I got to America. And I didn’t want to because the kids in the second grade class that I was already in were already bigger than me.

And when I saw the fourth grade, I was like, no, no. I was going to stay in the second grade. So anyway. Yeah, so I use the term jingling and she didn’t understand what that was. And so I said, you know, like when I was urinating, you know, so and so peeked over the wall and was watching me and I didn’t know how to react.

So I just told the teacher I don’t remember anything else after that. It’s been so long ago. But yeah. So that’s the second story. Yeah.

So jingling is not the Tagalog word, but it is used often for that. So so there’s jingling and there’s comfort room or CR for bathroom. And I’m planning to do an episode about that. Don’t worry. It won’t be disgusting either.

I just have some stuff that I’ve observed. OK, so. So that was the second story. Now I got a third. Third story when I was I think I was in college, I took a trip back to the Philippines.

I think it was like the late 90s. Right. And so I hung out with my uncle, Tito Eric. Shout out to Tito Eric. Hopefully you don’t mind me sharing this story.

Tito Eric is a few years older than me. So we were we were pretty close in age. I think we were like eight years apart, probably. Something like that. And so we hung out, we hung out together one night and we went bar hopping.

And so there were like a lot of bars that had live music, live bands. It was awesome. You know, we just went in. There’s like an entrance fee usually. And you had to drink a certain amount and it’s part of the cover charge.

And we hung out just. And, you know, drank and listened to live music and live bands. It was awesome. And so we I think we jumped around like three bars as each set closes, like there was a break and we didn’t want to hang around. And we wanted to check out different types of music.

So we stayed out around, oh, man, probably close to midnight. So the last bar and we left and I forgot to pee. And, you know, I’ve been drinking all night and I just had to go. Well, we couldn’t go back to the bar because we would have to pay another entrance fee. And like there is no exceptions.

Right. So as we walk towards the jeepney stop, which is one of the method of transportation, usually late at night, you don’t want to take a cab or anything. So we were waiting for some jeepneys and and on the way to one of the stops. Like I just couldn’t hold it anymore. And so I had to go.

And then my mom was like, you know, I just just go right there. I mean, it’s late anyway. It’s nighttime. You know, hardly anyone’s on the street, whatever. And so I started going.

Sure enough, just our luck. I don’t know if they were police officers. From my understanding, there’s hardly any police officers after seven. So I don’t know if that’s just, you know, their schedule. But beyond that, there are these barangay like officials or something.

So barangay is like a section or a block of like a city or something. And so these people are kind of like the neighborhood watch. But, you know, they have some authority. And sure enough, as I was doing it, I believe like three three of them rolled up on us. And I was like, hey, you’re not supposed to do that.

And I’m like, I was just pretty much, you know, intoxicated. So whatever, man, let me just let me just finish because I’m already I’m already doing it. So so he waited. And my uncle is like, dang it. So so I finished and he they were like, OK, you need to come with us.

And so they they took us to this like vehicle and we were riding. And my uncle was like, I could just sense him being stressed. Like, what am I going to tell your dad? And, you know, blah, blah, blah. And I’m just I’m just relaxed because I was drunk.

And, you know, I just want to I just want to sleep. I don’t care where. And so so my uncle started thinking of a plan. And because he’s like, man, we can’t get arrested. And, you know, this, this and this.

And so he asked, like, how much money I had left. I think I had like 200 pesos. That was a roughly like 40 dollars. And so my uncle like devised this like thing, a plan or whatever. And he was like, sir, sir, you know, I had to say that slow because I’m not good with Tagalog anymore.

But so that meant, you know, maybe maybe we could talk this out. So I’m sure we could have gotten away with it because we weren’t read our rights or anything. They just picked us up. But anyway, we didn’t want to waste our time. So he was like, hey, maybe we could talk this out or whatever.

And the guy wouldn’t hear it like he just ignored us. And so he just kept thinking. And he’s like, you know, he was saying, you know, so that means like looks like you guys haven’t had coffee yet. You know, it’s late at night. So he pulled out the 200 and just said, what did he say?

He said something like, maybe you could put this on your coffee fund. You know, like, here you go. I know you guys are planning to have coffee. Just just go ahead and add this to whatever coffee you’re going to be drinking. And so I was like listening.

And in the way he said it, it’s like it’s nothing illegal. You’re not bribing them. You’re just pretty much just saying, you know, hey, if you guys are going to plan on having coffee anyway, you might as well just add this to the, you know, to your to your coffee. Like he didn’t say, if you let us go, you know, we’re going to do this. Right.

So so it was pretty smooth. And, you know, and they pulled over. They pulled over and just dropped dropped us off. All right. Don’t don’t do that again.

OK. You know, because I think my uncle was also saying, like, you know, this can’t happen. You know, my my nephew’s here from California and he has a flight tomorrow. He can’t miss that flight. He’s about to leave.

So this can’t happen. So just, you know, it looks like you haven’t had coffee and go ahead and just add this to whatever coffee you guys are going to have. That’s it. And they dropped us off at some corner. We don’t even know and found a Jeep and just went home.

But but, yeah, that was that was it. So it was pretty much similar to that Dolphy story in the movie where, although I knew that it was wrong, I just had to go. I just had to go. And it just so happens that there were like, but on guy patrols in that area. And yeah, and they got they got us.

Well, they got me. And so they they took my uncle anyway, because I was with him or he was with me. And so that was it. That so that was it. So if if you’re still listening, thank you.

And I don’t think it was pretty bad. Right. I hope you guys were entertained by those stories. But yeah, there are signs throughout Manila and other cities that you shouldn’t be, you know, doing your thing in public. Yeah, it does sound weird, but it has to be there because people do do that.

And as I mentioned before, I believe they started putting up like stalls. They’re just like walls, four walls that that guys could go in. And there’s like a drain on the bottom. And and you just you just do it. You just do it if you had to go.

Also, I think what it is, too, there’s there’s so many homeless people, so many people in poverty and the lack of accessibility to public restrooms is also a problem. So that’s why the people just go. People just go where they, you know, try try to just be away from people and they just go. And, you know, when nature. Cause, you know, sometimes you just you just can’t ignore it.

So so, yeah, hopefully you enjoyed this episode. But while we hit it, though, and yeah, that’s pretty much it. Please check out the show notes podcast that Sherwin M dot com slash seven also have a Facebook page. Sherwin M podcast. You could pretty much find me anywhere at W1 and seven eight.

Don’t. Don’t forget to subscribe with your favorite pod catcher. And if you do use iTunes, please like log in, you know, subscribe and also rate my show. It would be pretty awesome. And let me know how I’m doing, you know.

So that pretty much is about it. Thank you for listening. And I’ll see you next time.